Snail Oil

Feb. 7th, 2015 11:40 am
armyofsnails: (snail boob)
Poem written by a friend of mine as "a sort of dedication for your important birthday celebrations" (which means, it wasn't written for me but was conveniently rebranded for the day).

Snail Oil

When we breathe and the air comes out it does so quickly
Effortless and without motion not engaged in rampant movement
Eddies reflect in the dancing air in slivers of dust filled wonder
Floating motes of wisdom failing to evolve

And how does the omniscient snail draw itself from its shell so smooth
How does it unsqueeze and grow within it
How does it remember when to stop or force itself from its home?
Is this an evolutionary angle we forgot to explore?
Is it the solution to a skeleton, keep on making it like an ice caking marathon?

At first the stalagmites form, each drip deposits minerals
they cling to each other by accident

Then, later on when the lobster crawled
Out of the water to catch a morsel
It grew claws
And they had to be hard
To protect it a shell formed
It became too large to fit in it
It could not eat more

And then to walk without the support of water
We needed our shells for structure and grew skins for defence
Being food is not dishonorable but now we need cunning to protect
ourselves from predators and wrap our bodies up pretending we
preserve innocence, pretending flesh colours

And still I have a question
When did the snail oil become all these machines
these devices we have to wear that tell us where to walk
these motivators and circuits that direct us with advice
and sell us a grave site, a hard case to keep us after we have finished
armyofsnails: (time snail)
Well, this is embarrassing. I was sent home earlier this morning by our office secretary for being the carrier of disease - have only just recovered from norovirus, but even though I'm feeling better apparently I'm still infectious. An unexpected birthday present from last Saturday; *someone* (I'll probably never know who, and does it really matter?) has given it to two of my friends as well... One of them now on holiday in Barbados! Crikey.

I did in fact remember all of my birthday and the day after. Read more... )

Birthday

Feb. 2nd, 2013 08:30 am
armyofsnails: (time snail)

So I'm now a year older (not far off trying to make people forget what age I really am... futilely no doubt. But who cares if I'm thirty or fifty, right?) I was going do to a summary for 2012 but failed miserably, so this is a substitute for that.

Some of this may read as a bit of a 'London life' informercial.. Hello Time Out? )
armyofsnails: (time snail)
Happy birthday, [livejournal.com profile] el_kab!
Love you, miss you always.

armyofsnails: (time snail)
Happpy birthday, [livejournal.com profile] el_kab!

If you were here last night you could have watched fireworks with me...

HOT

Feb. 5th, 2010 01:39 pm
armyofsnails: (Japanese)
Best. Birthday present. EVER.
armyofsnails: (time snail)




armyofsnails: (Simpsons)
Yesterday I smoked a sheesha for the first time (with apple flavoured tobacco) and danced on chairs. Pimms, mojitos and champagne mmmm.

[livejournal.com profile] kostriko's 30th is only a few days before mine (hers is at the end of January and mine in the beginning of February). To make us sound even more ancient than we actually will be, we have decided to organise a combined "O and T are turning 60" bash in London with possibly a visit to Absolut Ice Bar followed by general debauchery. [livejournal.com profile] romanthefirst has promised solemnly that he will dress up in fishnet tights and dance on the bar table to celebrate this remarkable event.

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