Headlines

Aug. 3rd, 2014 12:55 am
armyofsnails: (time snail)
[personal profile] armyofsnails
Whenever I think about writing updates on my life in this blog again, most of what comes to mind is short headline-style material, a bit ridiculous, such as:

~ENCOUNTER WITH MUSTACHED CONTORTIONIST FROM NATIONAL OPERA'S COSI FAN TUTTE~

~FOUR HOURS OF TATTOOING AFTER TRANSATLANTIC FLIGHT CAUSES RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME~

~DOMINATRIX ASKS FOR ADVICE ON FALLING IN LOVE WITH GAY MAN, TALKS ABOUT DEFECATING ON CLIENT'S CHEST~

...etc. Coming up with anything longer than a handful of sentences seems quite hard these days. I blame Twitter. Perhaps more will follow. But before I go, one more from earlier this evening:

~ TRAIN FROM BRIGHTON PRIDE, RUDE LESBIANS SHOUT LOUDLY WHILE SNIFFING POPPERS~

(Text below by a friend of mine)

Just encountered some really loud fucked lesbians on the train back from Pride and spent the journey secretly creating a punk band with bandname and song titles based on stuff they were yelling about.

The band is called Smokey Minge. And the songs:

1. fuck your minge, get me 'ome
2. Where the hell's my fanny pack?
3. I've got a Rottweiler
4. Shut uuuuuuup
5. Fuck my minge man
6. I've gone thru every emotion
7. agrhhhh I've just pissed
8. Cock it to the side
9. My arse is gonna fall out
10. Where's the fucking platform?


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